Reflections of my 30's.......
It's been a while since I've written. 5 months. I've had this blog written for a while but wanted to share on my birthday and today I am 40! Lately my mind has been full of thoughts from my 30's and reflecting on how we made it through. My 30's were such a hard time in my life. Our children being born are the joy I have from being in my 30's. Living a lie is so exhausting and scary and unpredictable, but unfortunately the society we live in tells us to live that way. Keep the uncomfortable, messy and hard stuff hidden. Only speak and show the good things. I lived in constant fear of rejection for myself and for my family. Keeping secrets causes an anxiety that I hope no one ever has to endure. I'm admitting something I've never told anyone- I believe part of me spent the last 10 years being bitter and upset with God as to why this was my cross to bear. I am a Christian and I love Jesus but I was mad. Everywhere I turned all I saw was carefree liv